Older Child Adoption
Planning to adopt a school-age child? With preparation and patience, a few adjustments on both sides, and some unconventional parenting methods, you'll find that bringing home an older child can be a deeply rewarding way to form a family.
AF's guide to older child adoption will help you navigate the journey, with personal stories of parents who have already adopted a child (or two) of toddler age or beyond, as well as a collection of helpful resources, and real-life advice from experts on the transition to family.
PLUS: Check out expert answers to your reader questions, from AF's older-child adoption expert Dr. Gregory Keck!
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| Getting Started |
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Adopting an Older Child?
by Carrie Howard
Moms and dads share the special joy that comes with bringing home a school-age child, and the unique parenting approach that helps their families bond.
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What We Wish We Had Known
by Judy and Sara Myerson
A mother and her "ready-made" daughter share lessons learned about older child adoption.
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When One Parent Is Rejected
by Mary Hopkins-Best, Ph.D.
Selective rejection of one parent is not uncommon in families that adopt toddler-age children. Here's how to cope.
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Into the Safety of Our Hearts
by Karyn Purvis, Ph.D., and David Cross, Ph.D.
Forming strong attachments is possible when adopting an older or at-risk child. Two experts share how to create a safe environment for our children.
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| Personal Stories |
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Getting Past the Anger
by Janice Goldwater
When a child joined her family at age 10, she was violent and terrified of love. Here, a mother how her family overcame trials to become one.
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We've Always Done It That Way
by Rose Godfrey
Katia and Edward, 10 and nine years old, came into our lives with no more of an idea of how to become a family than we had. But, the journey of our first Christmas together etched a road of heart-warming traditions.
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The Baby Who Never Cried
by Gina Hagler
The experts told me not to worry. But I trusted my instincts and found ways to ease my older son's transition into our family.
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A Past Without Pictures
by Katherine Sanders
When you adopt a child at an older age, putting together a history can be difficult.
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And Now We Are Three
by Jeff Gottesfeld with Cherie Bennett
Mix one American couple, one preteen Russian boy, and one summer program, ...and what do you get? Family.
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What the Books Didn't Tell Me
by Carrie Krueger
When their three-year-old son arrived home, this family quickly learned they had to set aside tried-and-true parenting methods in favor of the nurturing he’d never known.
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A Home for Helen
by Melissa Fay Greene
She was a motherless five-year-old living in an Ethiopian orphanage. But the package in her hands promised a brighter future.
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| Online Resources |
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Older Child Adoption
Articles on older child adoption, a discussion forum, and links about adoptive parenting, international adoption, and special needs.
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Attachment & Trauma Network
An international support and resource community formed by three adoptive mothers for children and families affected by attachment problems or other disorders.
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Children’s Disabilities Info
Interviews and articles pertaining to special needs adoptions.
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Adopt_Older_Kids
Online support group for those who have been touched by older child adoption.
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Families with Older Internationally Adopted Children
Online support group for families adopting children ages 10+. |
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Comments
So nice to hear about other parent's experiences with domestic adoption. My husband and I adopted our son domestically when he was 5 days old. I turned 47 the following week and then my husband had his 61st birthday the next month. We are often mistaken for my son's grandparents but my husband, who has grown kids and grandkids from a previous marriage, laughs it off. I have gotten used to it and call myself "the oldest mommy on the block". Our son is the joy and light of our life. He is 4 years old now and smart as a whip and as energetic as they come, He keeps us running. Having him in our life has challenged me to get in shape and lose the middle age weight gain! We may be an unusual couple due to our age but our love is strong and our faith in our decision to adopt has never wavered. We didn't have the stamina to travel and do an international adoption so this was the only path for us, but it was much easier than we expected. Two months after filling out paperwork with a wonderful agebcy we got our call. Not bad! We loved our attorney and still send cards every year.
Posted by: Leslie at 5:52pm Jan 8
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