As I prepared to adopt my second child, I welcomed the home study worker into a perfectly clean and ordered home. The scene that greeted her at her post-placement visit was, well, different—but much more real.
Thank You, Bàba
Six months after she came home to us, our daughter stopped speaking. As I searched for clues as to her sudden silence, I became profoundly grateful to her Chinese foster father, a man I had never met, for teaching me a valuable lesson about selfless love.
“Finding My Inner Mom”
For years, I felt ambivalence about becoming a parent, and worry that I wouldn’t be a “perfect” mother. In an open letter to my daughter, I look back on that moment of calm and utter clarity when we met.
“How We Bonded with Our Child”
All prospective adoptive parents wonder whether they’ll be able to attach to heir newborn baby before adoption. AF readers describe their concerns—and what they did to alleviate them.
“Fool for Love”
From the start, silliness and laughter have bolstered the bond between my daughter and me.
Celebrating Sameness in Your Family
Help your preschooler process the world around him by pointing out the ways you are alike.
“Motherhood, Cleaved.”
My love for my youngest child, who was born to me, takes a different timbre from my love for my twins through adoption. Accepting this helps me understand the inimitable bond they share with their birth mother, and the ache she must feel.
Parents Share: “My Best Bonding Advice”
Adoptive moms and dads share their best advice for bonding with a newly adopted child, from taking time off to never leaving a child to cry it out at night.
Lessons I’ve Learned from My Children
Over decades as a foster and adoptive parent and an adoption social worker, I have mothered and supported hundreds of children. Each one has taught me more than I passed along to them. Here is just some of that wisdom.
“Black, White, and the Cornrow in Between”
While it might have been “just hair” to me, the emotions were far more tangled for them, with roots deep into the history of oppression between our two peoples.
Yes, You Can Breastfeed
Now you need to decide if it’s right for you and your family.
“The Adoption Advantage”
Coming to parenthood on equal terms lets my husband and me appreciate the experience all the more.
Share Your Story: Baby Carriers
Adoptive moms are passionate about their baby carriers. We asked for your favorites and here’s what you said.
When Adoption Travel is a Family Affair
Guess who’s coming with moms and dads on the adoption trip? Their moms and dads!
Post-Arrival Medical Evaluations
Your guide to identifying medical problems common to internationally adopted children.
Book Review: The Safe Baby
The Safe Baby is an easy-to-follow resource that will give busy parents — adoptive or otherwise — peace of mind.
“Are Adoptive Moms Allowed to Have a Bad Day?”
After finally realizing my dream of becoming a mother, I found what most new parents find—along with the bliss come days filled with crying, spit-up, and leaking diapers. But when I dared to vent, I was chided: “You wanted to adopt…you asked for this!”
“Loving My Daughter, A Country Apart”
I didn’t travel to meet my new daughter. But nothing could stop me from becoming Maura’s mommy.
“Should We Keep or Change Our Child’s Name?”
We carefully choose our children’s names. But wait—our children will soon have their own ideas about who they are and what they should be called.
Share Your Story: Naming Adoptive Children
In “Naming Madison”, Dawn Friedman argued in favor of keeping her daughter’s birth name. We asked our readers: Should adoptive parents choose their child’s name?