When people learned I was pregnant, they were surprised that I was still planning to adopt.
The Choices We Make
Choosing age, race, and even gender is sometimes seen as the perk of adoption. Be careful not to attach expectations to these selections.
“How I Handled Calls from Prospective Birth Mothers”
Our advertising was placed, our adoption profile was ready to go, and it was only a matter of time before our 800-line started ringing with calls from expectant mothers. Yikes! Mercifully, I was prepared, thanks to the expertise of my adoption attorney, adoption consultant, and other adoptive parents. Here’s what I learned:
The First Conversation with a Potential Birth Parent
What matters most is not a list of questions or negotiating points, but finding a way to meet genuinely as people.
Assessing a Referral
We’ve heard from our agency that we’ll be receiving an adoption referral soon. What medical information will it contain, and how should we assess it?
Parent-to-Parent: Was It Fate?
On our Facebook page we asked readers: Adoption stories often involve serendipity. Please share any amazing coincidences that arose on your journey to family. Here are some of your responses
“A Love We Never Expected”
When we first considered adoption, my husband and I discussed how much contact we were willing to have with the birth mother. We didn’t realize how close we’d become to the whole birth family.
“Our Happiest Meal”
Last September, after a Saturday morning of shopping with my mother, we stopped for a frozen yogurt. Around 12:15 P.M. I got a call from Kelly Jacobson, a contact at our agency. I presumed it was something volunteer related, as I had been helping out at the agency, so I calmly answered the phone.
“A Night I’ll Never Forget”
After 10 years, my husband and I were starting to doubt we’d ever be parents. But when the phone rang, I knew it was “The Call.”
“Our First Choice”
I always knew I wanted to grow my family through adoption.
Specifying Gender When Adopting
We surveyed our reader’s feelings on specifying gender when adopting. Here’s what real adoptive parents had to say.
“Coming Clean About My Troubled Past with an Expectant Mother”
Coming clean to our birth mother about my unstable past helped us build a solid foundation for our future.
Gifts for Birth Parents
Our readers share their recommendations for gifts for birth parents at the time of placement. Their advice? Keep it small and personal!
“Face of the Future”
From the moment her image first appeared on my computer screen, I was her mother.
“Waiting for Joseph”
During the process to adopt from the foster system, we faced a series of delays. But, at the end, we found a love that was worth the wait.
“Fostering Love”
With fost-adopt, I didn’t need to own a home or have $50,000 in the bank to become a parent.
“Adopting Our Son’s Birth Sister”
When we adopted our son’s biological sister, it felt both eerily similar and completely different.
“Our Frantic 24 Hours After Getting the Adoption Call”
We had only been “active” with our adoption agency for two months. So when my husband went on a camping trip with no cell reception, we thought, “What could go wrong?”
What Does the Expectant Mother’s Attorney Do?
When an expectant parent chooses to be represented by an attorney, it is important for all of the parties in the adoption to understand that the role of the attorney is to advocate for his client. Our adoption law expert explains.
Ask AF: Writing an Adoption Reference Letter
A reader asks how to write a great adoption reference letter that her friend will show to prospective birth mothers.