People kept taking us, a threesome of foster kids, into their homes. But we never stuck.
“Letters of Love”
Sometimes I read the warm, loving letters my birth daughter’s parents send and feel almost incapable of responding. But I always do.
“Having ‘the Talk’ with My Black Son”
It’s not easy to teach your child that people may fear him because of the color of his skin—but it’s something parents through transracial adoption must do.
“Writing, Then Re-Writing, Our ‘Dear Expectant Mother’ Letter”
What do you write when the merchandise on offer is your heart?
“How to Be His Mother”
Twenty-six years after placing my son for adoption, we found each other. That’s when I started learning—the hard way—how to be a mom.
“The Fierce Feelings of Motherhood”
In this personal essay, the author reflects on the surprising fierceness of feeling like a mom.
“The Blank Spaces” – Prenatal Alcohol Exposure Effects
I am angry at the price my son has to pay for his birth mother’s decision to drink while pregnant — but I can’t be angry at her.
“How Do You Define Motherhood?”
To many people, sharing DNA and giving birth are the prerequisites to being a “real” mom. As my children’s mommy, I know better.
“Joining an African-American Church”
My wife and I were nervous the first Sunday we attended an African-American church. Would they welcome us? Would they stare? We should have had faith.
“The Stages of Waiting”
Are all the bewildering ups and downs I’ve experienced during our wait typical of the international adoption process?
“Older, Wiser, and Warming Bottles”
Adoptive parents pushing the mid-century mark are joining playgroups and diggingDora the Explorer. What’s age got to do with it?
“An Unmatched Set” Can I Love a Child Who Doesn’t Look Like me?
Could I love a child who doesn’t look like me? Yes. More than I’ve ever thought possible.
The Reluctant Spouse
Don’t be surprised if your mate resists adoption even as you are embracing it.
“What the Books Didn’t Tell Me”
When Christopher joined our family at age three, I had to set aside my tried and true parenting methods in favor of the sort of nurturing he’d never known.
“When Will an Expectant Mother Pick Us?”
During the long wait for an adoption match, friends and family may be sympathetic, but they don’t understand the anxiety that leads you to question every aspect of your adoption profile — and yourself.
“No Longer Hoping for a Miracle Pregnancy”
An imminent hysterectomy is helping me realize that I no longer want to become pregnant — I only want to be the best mother I can be to my children, who came to me through adoption.
“Cornrows Fit for a Ballerina!”
A simple hairstyle was not so simple for a dance class full of little girls with beautiful heads of black hair.
“From Our Hearts”: Letters to Our Child’s Birth Parents
Writing about the little things in letters to our daughter’s birth parents often tells a bigger, warmer story in the end.
“Getting Rid of ‘Gotcha Day'”
What do you call the day your adoptive child came home? In this personal essay, one mother explains why “Gotcha Day” can be offensive for some adoptees.
“Our Agonizing Decision to Decline a Referral”
We thought accepting a referral would be the easy part. It wasn’t.