Seeing where she was born—where she stayed with her birth mom and where we met her—gave my daughter greater confidence in her adoption story.
“How I Finally Got Into Club Mom”
The cruelest parts of infertility? Having to attend baby showers, coo over ultrasound pictures, and being told it’s “God’s will” that you’re still childless.
“Real-World Lessons”: Adopting a Teenager from Foster Care
We adopted a teenager from foster care as veteran parents and thought we were prepared for what lay ahead—but our new son still taught us a thing or two.
“Raising California”
Families are forming in all sorts of ways, in a rainbow of colors, and my son through adoption is growing up right in the middle of all of it.
“Intimate Strangers”
She was going to have a child but couldn’t keep it, I wanted a child desperately but couldn’t have one. She was the mother at birth; I was the mother right after. It sounds simple, but it wasn’t.
“On Becoming African American”
Raised in a white community, I’ve just begun to embrace my heritage.
“True Love, Times Two”
I used to wonder whether my love for my son would be more intense if I’d given birth to him. Having a biological child validated the depth of my feelings the first time around.
“Our Family’s Unique Kwanzukkah Celebration”
The story of how one transracial family reinvented their holiday traditions.
“Negotiating a Workable Schedule After Adoption”
I assumed I’d be offered the same leave and benefits as moms who give birth. When I wasn’t, here’s how I negotiated with my employer.
“Guarding My Heart During the Wait”
After years of grappling with infertility, I could only focus on what might go wrong during our (in hindsight) perfect match and my daughter’s birth.
“Seeing My Daughter’s ‘Happily Ever After'”
My daughter, Rubie, has the kind of life I’d dreamed of for her, and is where she belongs. I only wish I had known that sooner.
“The Second Half of My Life”
I had been a hard-driving reporter and happily single. But now, I was ready for something more.
“She’s Leaving Home”
My daughter, whom I swear I just brought home yesterday, is gracefully settling into college.
“How Jesse Learned to Play”
There was no time for fun in the orphanage. But at home in America, four-year-old Jesse discovered water balloons, trampolines — and his inner Hercules.
“More Than Skin Deep”
My attachment is so fierce, it takes my breath away.
“How I Was (Sort of) Able to Breastfeed”
If breastfeeding had been easy in the past, adoptive breastfeeding couldn’t be so different, or less rewarding, could it? More or less.
“Do Fan Dances and Tea Ceremonies Really Teach Us Anything?”
The museum view of culture and heritage ignores the realities of life as a racial minority. But there is a middle ground.
“Lessons Learned from a Failed Adoption Match”
When friends asked, I’d always assured them I wasn’t sad that I hadn’t given birth to my sons. A heartbreaking false start helped me see that I was truly at peace with that fact.
“Pulling Back in Open Adoption”
After a bump in the relationship with our daughter’s birth mother, we’re learning lessons about love, patience, and acceptance.
“The Girls of Summer”
I want my active daughter to know it’s OK to play sports and be physically strong. I’m just not the best example of that athletic ideal.